A few fellow travelers
It was our way of recharging batteries as a couple and then being better parents. This attitude generated many enemies that considered me a bad mother, because “surrendered mothers do not separate from my children or leave them ‘abandoned with their grandparents’ to go on a trip.”
But, honestly, I’ve always been a free soul and travel, my way out of stress. And really, until I did not lack my partner and began to weaken my self-esteem and my security in my actions, I did not care much what others thought if I saw that our little family was happy. And it was.
Only three months before he died, we all went to Tenerife, a very comfortable trip because my dwarf was still having a tit and I didn’t have to worry about his food. It’s the last vacation memory together and we had a great time! Because that was the deal: travel for dad and mom during the course and vacation all together on some island in summer, in addition to the usual visits to grandparents on the beach.
So that fateful first year I had as a revelation and decided to continue doing the same routines with my children. It was August and I had no time to lose so I went with my little girl to Paris, to make a trip to suit her, with theme park included.
I have to admit that I was panicking traveling alone with her and tried to convince other mothers with children, but none dared: Organized travel on my own, online and so cheap? Impossible.
So luckily we were alone and, from then on, Kenya became my adventure companion. Who could I find more related to me?
I will not fool anyone if I say it was not hard. I cried before, during and after the trip, my first family outing without Arturo.
If my daughter saw me cry, she said: “Mom, don’t cry, Daddy is with us and he doesn’t stop laughing because he is happy, as always.”
She still remembers our first solo getaway, which has been repeated every year. The problem? That she has become a tireless traveler who speaks four languages because “they are necessary to meet people from all parts of the world.”
As for his brother … Yago was still very small and, silly of me, I thought I should turn more to Kenya, which was the one that most noticed the loss of his father. He was such a baby that he couldn’t miss him…
A big mistake that I discovered later because babies do live the losses and of course they need our love multiplied by two. But when you suffer, you are not aware of these things.
So he had to wait for the next summer to go on a family vacation again. And with a very large family, because from that year, we started traveling with a school mother and her daughter, a classmate from Kenya: Ibiza, Menorca, Las Palmas … and the experience has been very rewarding.
If you travel with another single-parent family, you don’t feel alone, you share daily tasks, schedule the routes with another adult who understands you perfectly and the children grow up together as if they were their cousins.
I don’t know if it’s the right option or not, but it worked for me. And I hope that, if only a little, it has helped you to feel identified (or identified) and help you understand that we can move forward, that we can continue to enjoy our family vacations, and that summer can continue to be a moment of laughter and casual memories with our children.
I would love to know your experience and, if you need help, do not hesitate to write to me. I was also supported by other women and men who, like me, had to face a year the first summer of their lives, without their travel companions.